. . . . No, Thank You. . . . 

Those few words will forever be in mind when I think of my son from Estonia. I would like to share my own experiences in adopting my youngest son from Estonia.

Approximately five years ago, after concentrating on my own career and advancement, I decided that I did not want to go through life without having the experience of being a parent. I knew that adopting a young from the U. S. was not an option due to waiting lists and because I was single.  I had heard stories concerning International Adoptions that dragged out for months, mountains of required paper work, and mandatory travel to a foreign land. But, I decided that my desire to have a child was greater than any obstacle that could be presented to me. Therefore, I set sail on the great adoption adventure.

I adopted my first son in February 2000. I prefer not to mention the country but want to use this experience as a comparison to adopting from Estonia.  Earlier this past summer (2003) I decided to adopt another male child. That decision was easily made. However, choosing an agency took a few months.  I knew I didn’t want to use the first agency and I really wanted to adopt from another country. I was so happy that I found AdoptionPatch.com.  I immediately knew that I wanted to work with Trinette and the organizations that she represented. What a great and positive experience.  Preparing the dossier required perhaps no more than four hours! The only thing that did take time was getting the state to apostil the documents. The homestudy was conducted by the same organization that I used in the first adoption. They also completed this in a timely manner.
I was concerned about the amount of time that it would take getting INS Approval especially after 9/11. However, once I got my initial application back to go get my prints, the approval came in less than two weeks!  I called Diana, the International Coordinator to arrange a preview visit to Estonia. We were able to set up the preview trip and Diana made housing arrangements for me.

I arrived in Estonia approximately 6 pm and quickly got thru customs. Due to a delay in my flight, the driver that Diana had arranged was not able to pick me up. So, first test was to find a driver and find the way to the hotel. Anyone concerned about finding a driver that speaks English-don’t worry-they are several.  The next day, Igor came to the apartment to take me to the orphanage. It was not what I expected due to my prior experience. The building was great. The outside reminded me of an office building. And, the orphanage was not in a “bad” neighborhood either.
We met with the director and she said that Gena (Evan) would soon be ready. We walked into the playroom and I was pleasantly surprised. It was clean and in the middle of the room was a tyco playground. Soon Gena came walking into the room. Once again, I was perceived notions due to a prior experience. Gena was healthy, a bit on the shy side (has had limited exposure to men) and showed no “orphanage behaviors”.  I was able to play with Evan for approximately an hour before a representative from the Social Ministry came in. I was so impressed with her professionalism and knowledge.
Having similar educational backgrounds (educational) we were able to discuss several items that I wanted more information about. 

When she prepared to leave, I told her that I definitely wanted to adopt Gena and I thanked her for allowing me to do so. Her response ………No, Thank You, we want our children to be adopted and not spend their life an orphanage.

I was able to visit Gena that afternoon and the following afternoon as well. In between these times, I felt so comfortable and safe in Tallin, that I went exploring and Christmas Shopping. The people are very helpful!!! Just ask and you will get help from someone that can speak fluent or limited English!

If anyone is considering adopting, consider Estonia and Adoption Patch. I cannot wait to return to Estonia!!!

-Kevin C.  kccogdill@sbcglobal.net